All times are UTC




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 200 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 10, 11, 12, 13, 14
Author Message
 Post subject: Re: Jokes
PostPosted: Wed Jun 08, 2011 5:16 pm 
Offline
Willie Nelson's Martin "Trigger"
Willie Nelson's Martin "Trigger"
User avatar

Joined: Fri Aug 01, 2008 1:58 pm
Posts: 1156
Location: Virginia
A blonde received a certificate for helicopter flying lessons for her birthday. One day she was bored and decided to take advantage of the opportunity.



When she arrived at the place, the man said "Well, there's only one helicopter here, and it only has one seat, if I show you how to do it, do you mind going up solo?"



"Oh, of course! I can handle it" the blonde replied.



Well, he showed her the inner-workings of the helicopter and sent her on her way, only asking that she radio in every 400ft. just to make sure everything was going smoothly.



At 400ft, she radioed in saying, "Wow! This is so much fun!"



At 800 ft. She radioed in again saying "This is pretty easy, I can do this all day!"



At 1200 ft. She didnt. He waited and waited, and didn't hear from the blonde! Seconds later he heard a crash in the field next to the station. He ran out to see what happened, the blonde crashed!



Luckily she survived, "What happened?!" he exclaimed.



"Well, I was doing fine, but, I started to get cold, so I just turned off the big fan!"

_________________
It's easy saying nothing when there's nothing to say
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes
PostPosted: Wed Jun 08, 2011 8:47 pm 
Offline
Jimi Hendrix's Fender Stratocaster
Jimi Hendrix's Fender Stratocaster
User avatar

Joined: Wed Feb 04, 2009 5:42 pm
Posts: 5545
Location: lima, peru
:lol:

_________________
Push a little longer, dance a little harder.. Never give yourself away
Love a little less to, keep yourself together.. Everything'll come your way


Image Image

Patty =)


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes
PostPosted: Wed Jul 13, 2011 10:29 pm 
Offline
Joan Jett's Gibson Melody Maker
Joan Jett's Gibson Melody Maker
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 23, 2007 5:11 pm
Posts: 5267
Location: west side of the pond
PONDERISMS


1· I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.

2· There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.

3· Life is sexually transmitted.

4· Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

5· The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

6· Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

7· Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?

8· Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

9· All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

10· In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

11· How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

12· Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly things and drink whatever comes out?'

13· If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?

14· Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

15· If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

16· Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

17· Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

18· Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

_________________
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes
PostPosted: Sun Feb 26, 2012 8:01 pm 
Offline
Chrissy Hynde's Fender Telecaster
Chrissy Hynde's Fender Telecaster

Joined: Thu May 18, 2006 4:11 pm
Posts: 434
Location: Austin, Texas
How does hitler like to tie his shoes?

In little knotsies.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: Jokes
PostPosted: Tue Feb 28, 2012 7:38 pm 
Offline
Angus Young's Gibson SG
Angus Young's Gibson SG
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 11, 2005 12:58 pm
Posts: 12133
Danielle702 wrote:
How does hitler like to tie his shoes?

In little knotsies.


Its so bad its funny... :lol:

ANDY B... :smt023

_________________
ImageImage
Image


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 200 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 10, 11, 12, 13, 14

All times are UTC


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 2 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group